I didn't write because I didn't know what to say. Now though, I think I can. Everything in the short term seemed to be so frivolous in the beginning... "oh hey, here we are at this place with the stuff". But really, when it comes down to it, we aren't tourists. My husband, Curtis, and I came to Korea not only because of the adventure but for the opportunity. We are teachers, that is our degree and our vocation. I personally have decided to commit to working with children young and older because it is a good fit for me. We have spent the last four-ish years of our lives pursuing this field and no sooner did they release us from our career program than we hopped on a plane bound for this country. We are here to be teachers, we are here because there are little to no job opportunities in California. We are here to see sights that we haven't seen before and find adventure in our first year of marriage. So here we are, newly weds with not much but what we brought with us in our suitcases. We read the blogs, studied the books, and tried to prepare ourselves for something, we knew not what.
Now we know more. And it changes the tone of the blog not for better or worse just different. Because... this isn't vacation, it is living life in a new and strange place. It is working and surviving and getting along where we have very little grounding. What before was novelty has become simply life, but harder than before because, in many ways during this period of adjustment, we are blind and deaf at once. Everything is new... the language seems insurmountable at times, the food quite different, the grass much greener where we once were. It wouldn't be exaggeration to say that the sky and moon seem different here, because they do. It wouldn't be exaggeration to say that we might have grown a little older since the end of February when we got on the plane bound for South Korea. What we read and expected ironed out differently, for better or worse. What they don't tell you before you arrive is almost more important than what they do. All the blogs, books and blather can be regarded or disregarded according to each person 's experience.
What They Don't Tell You:
Work is hard.
When your about to leave many recruiters will say that the hours are short for good money. This is actually the case with some schools. However, We have been placed at a very prestigious school here in Pohang. No simple hours for us...We work from 8-6 everyday. Our workload is heavy, the hours tiring and the expectations of us never-ending. Here at iSponge English Institute, we have overweight expectations required of us which, given the hours in the day, cannot always be met. To counter this, however, we have bosses who are kind, helpful and caring. They try as hard as they can to make sure our adjustment is relatively easy and our needs met. In this way, we are almost coddled. I was sick a lot this month, and though I was unable to stay home from work, my director took me to the doctor and let me go home early. There seems to be a give and take here that balances some of the discomfort associated with the new work style and ethic we are yet unaccustomed to. We make 2.2 million won which is a little over 2 thousand dollars each per month. Its good money, but carries a lot of stress.
It's anything but picturesque.
I spend a lot of time trying to take pictures of the pretty things here in Korea. The older buildings, the palaces the cherry blossoms. But what I don't stress is that these buildings and landmarks are many times surrounded by slums and impoverished neighborhoods. There is a lot of dirt too, and garbage. In places like Seoul, this is less prevalent, but here in Pohang, the streets are dirty and dusty. It smells strange because the sewers are open and there is smelly garbage, often too many people and fish.... so many fish... just out there. There is mystery trash everywhere, spit on the ground and a fine layer of age and dust. And because of this...
Nothing lasts.
From the shoes on your feet to the clothes you wear... everything wears out twice as fast. We have been here for two months and so far I have worn out 2 pairs of shoes and ripped quite a few things. One of the problems is that everything must be hang-dried. We tend to take for granted the magic of a dryer where all elasticity is returned to clothes, most if not all lint gets removed and jeans become soft and pliable. Our clothes now are stretched out, hard as cardboard and covered in lint and other debris. We have to wait a day or two for our clothes to dry fully and have to be very strategic about how we go about doing our laundry. Results are wearing clothes too much, wearing them down, and being sad about it.
Being a pedestrian is more dangerous than being a driver.
When it comes to travel, there is really no safe way to go. Cars have the right of way. There are no turn signals and stoplights mean very little to the average driver. Close calls are multiple times, every day. There are few seat belts in cabs. Safely is second to getting where you need to be. I will never drive here. Ever. And I will always be careful where it is I step.
Some things are just... troublesome.
For example... we are video taped every second of the day. In school, outside, in shops, in our apartment hall. Everywhere. This is just how it works here. Everything is recorded. Parents come in and watch your class on a screen in the waiting area of the school and we as teachers may not even know.
Here's another: Korean parents are helicopter parents to the extreme. They complain if a child's hair looks wrong in the photos you take of them. Bumps and bruises from every-day 4-5 year old's are considered personal assaults on their children. The children are coddled, squeezed and gentled so badly that they are many times spoiled and undisciplined. I laugh at the way people remarked back home that "the children will be so well behaved". Its not true. It never was.
The culture here is fairly bigoted. They have one image for how a person should look and act and follow that. They have a view of the world they received from media images. To listen to them talk about "indians" and people of color is appalling to the western teacher. Even westernized bosses and directors have a vision for how things should be. This goes too for people with disabilities and mental disorders. They are avoided, scolded, chastised and of course "the mother is to blame" for their "issues and troublesome behavior"
There are ideas of how things should be. Korean culture is conservative. Nothing is wasted. Our apartment complex manager turned off the Internet for the whole complex (going on 4 days now) because he believed everyone is using too much Internet. There is little to no waste of anything, which is great, if not revolutionary... but it means that...
Everything is miniature.
Since nothing is wasted things are cut and drawn at exactly the size, shape or amount believed to be needed. Tiny cups of water are served with meals. Napkins are the size of one toilet paper square. The biggest bed size here is a little larger than a double. Clothing is sold in "big sizes" mostly only on the Internet, at least where I live. XXL means a large at the most. All food is shared so portions are medium sized compared to American size. Small cans of soda, small fries and burgers, small everything. You never realize how much opulence you live in until your husband is elbowing you off the bed or your trying to squeeze into a tiny pair of "plus sized" leggings.
Altogether, I have to try and express that the way things are here lies in our ability to expect the unexpected and get over ourselves. I have learned from long experience that many times I make things worse for myself by not accepting the way things are and adapting accordingly. We simply have to do just that, adapt. This blog won't be only woes, but it will have some. I wont just give you the niceties, because if anyone should come here later, its important to know what your in for, not just the goodies.
After all of that... Welcome to Korea. Thanks for taking this journey with us.
Jessie
